Living Abroad – The Upsides

Wouldn’t it be cool to live abroad? To bask in the Tuscan sun in short shorts like Armie Hammer, to become a samurai like Tom Cruise, or perhaps even ‘eat, pray, love’ your way around with Julia Roberts. Our films, books and popular culture have long been enamoured with the idea of leaving home for foreign shores. Whether for escape, adventure, or business, the expat life is captivating to many. In recent years, with the advent of air travel, globalisation, and EU citizenship (sigh), it has become an even more common experience to spend time in another country, among some groups even a right of passage. I mean, who hasn’t been in a conversation with that person who has shamelessly name-dropped every foreign destination where they’ve lived (“That reminds me of when I spend the summer on the Amalfi coast…ya ya ya.”) I should say now, as an expat myself (though I’m not really a fan of that word), if this has ever been me I’m sorry. And even as I write this, that almost seems a humble brag. So sorry, again.

I’ve lived in the Czech Republic for the past six years and have been reflecting on my time abroad in recent months, on the up and downsides of life in a country not your own. So this will be my attempt to share some of what I’ve learned of the good things that happen when you leave your home nation for a spell. I’ll follow it up with the not-so-good things in a later post.

Perhaps the best thing about being away from your home country is that suddenly your nationality becomes at once more and less significant. You automatically become both an ambassador and a scapegoat for the successes and failures of your nation. I didn’t really think much about being a Brit before I left England, but now every Brexit crisis and Royal drama is my concern, and I am the go to expert on anything to do with the UK. This can be a bit awkward, especially if someone tries to talk to me about the Premier League, of which I know nothing, but is also strangely affirming. I have become more proud of where I’m from as a result of leaving, not in a nationalist kind of way, but simply in terms of recognising the good things and the things I miss. Being encouraged when people speak warmly of my home and getting to bring my foreign friends home with me. Seeing home through others’ eyes has been a joyous experience for me.

But as I also said, your nationality also becomes less significant when you are away from your home. There’s a sense in which I’m simply ‘foreign’ when I’m here. Not Czech. I therefore immediately feel a greater affinity with other foreigners and, a bit like when you start University, feel an immediate closeness with others in a similar situation to me. This has led to forming fast and deep friendships with those I’ve met here, from all manner of nations. The unique ‘expat community’ is a wonderful thing to be a part of and I have been able to visit the homes of many foreign friends. I’ve had experiences in places I never would have thought to go without my experience of living abroad.

Perhaps a more subtle but nonetheless powerful thing about living abroad is in the way your underlying attitudes and ideas can change. You notice just how different perspectives are from different nations, yet also how much is shared. Before I lived in a place surrounded by Americans, for example, I think I felt that they were basically confident Brits with cowboy accents, yet I have learned so much about and from my American friends. I think that it’s more accurate to say that the only thing that is the same is the language, and that that is also quite different at times (my favourite recent example is learning that when you really need to use the toilet, Americans might say you’re ‘prairie dogging’ while Brits are more likely to go for the rather more literal ‘touching cloth’). I have learned from my friends and they have learned from me. We have changed and grown together in this funny melting pot that is international life.

It’s not one long Italian summer living abroad of course. There are real costs to moving far from home and I worry that some of the ways I’ve changed will mean it’s hard to readjust should I move home one day. But, I have to say, that I think the risks are worth it.

 

 

A Letter to My MP

Dear Anna,

Having clicked on the link I saw on facebook entitled ‘Breentry: Reject Brexit,’ I studiously searched for my MP and sent you the generic outraged plea that had been created. I’m sure you have received many such generic emails. When I received notice from your email that I needed to include my address and contact details, I thought I would reply with a more personal expression of my feelings about Brexit. For my feelings are strong and yet more subtle than any generic statement could encapsulate.

I have to say that I have felt very upset and disappointed about the result of the referendum, as my call to ‘Breentry’ (though what a terrible word that is) would suggest. I am actually currently living in Prague, Czech Republic, having been lucky enough to take advantage of the freedom of movement for all EU citizens. I am registered in Broxtowe as an overseas voter, having lived in Nottingham for 8 years previously.

The experience of living in a different nation has been an unfailingly positive one, as I have been able to learn more about different nations and peoples, recognising differences and similarities and most certainly becoming a more patient and tolerant person. The thought that future generations might not be able to enjoy this privilege deeply saddens me.

I recently came across a letter from prominent Czechs to the UK, in the run-up to the referendum. Here is a favourite quote – “Without the British legacy of democratic institutions, entrepreneurial spirit, common sense and pragmatic approach to problem-solving, the west as we know it would be much weakened, politically and spiritually.”

I feel that the UK has so much to offer Europe. That Europe has so much to offer the UK. I have seen and lived that. I have relished the honour of being an ambassador for the UK here in Central Europe and have learned so much about what the EU means through being here in a place which was so recently riven by war and destructive ideologies. Sadly, now I feel that the UK is the place riven and divided. It is my home and I am proud to be British, but I have never felt more ashamed of my nation. The response from my friends here, both European and from further afield, is one of consternation and sympathy at the mess we are in.

I want to make a plea to you and to your party, as our leaders, to represent not just the democratic mandate you have received to vote leave, but also the equally democratic incentive to seek compromise. To seek an arrangement where freedom of movement, goods and ideas can continue with the EU, as easily as possible. Without wanting to sound cliched, I am one of the 48%. Please ensure that you represent us in your decisions as well as the 52%.

Thank you for your service as my representative.

I trust that you will take all these considerations into account.

Sincerely,

Samwise

 

Czech Please….

Do you ever feel like you want to check out of your life?

Now don’t get scared, I mean more in the checking out of a hotel sense. Sometimes, don’t you just wish for something more, something different? The hum drum just gets very, well, hum drummy. It’s all too easy to get a bit jaded with the things around us, even the people around us, even our friends and family.

I have been feeling like I wanted to take a step away from ‘normality’ ever since I seemed to experience a ‘mid-twenties crisis’ back in the fall (I know, how self-indulgent of me). I really felt a deep frustration with where I was, even as I was aware of the great people and opportunities God has given me where I am. I described my feeling to a friend as ‘I just want to go and run in a field’ (amusingly, I literally did that soon after with my accomplice), expressing a desire, I guess, to run away.

Strange how one minute I was feeling rather smug with my permanent job, supportive friends and church, considering buying a house even, then suddenly wanted to run and hide. I’m not sure if it was a case of frustration with the hum drum but I have come to enjoy a feeling that my future is in God’s hands completely – whether here or far away.

The long and short of the situation is that I have ended up ‘Czeching’ out rather literally and moving to Prague to work in an international school there. Well, I will be moving there come the summer. Have I given in to my self-indulgentness? I hope not. I trust that God was giving me a wake-up call and reminding me that the plans I make are subject to his will.

Do I still want to check out of my life? No. I hope and pray that God would keep adjusting my view on ‘my life’ and keep surprising me with the direction it could take. How glancing at an online ad became a 4 day trip to Prague (best interview ever). How that became a job offer. How I’m coming to terms with saying goodbyes.

It’s so easy to wish for something different and I hope this whole post isn’t too hypocritical. I am going somewhere different. But I’m not checking out. Not of my friendships, family, especially not of relying on God. I hope, pray, plead that this is right, God’s plan. I am optimistic.

I think I have come to see that it’s OK to explore new opportunities, that we should push doors. But that we shouldn’t leave the hotel. I don’t need a new life, new friends, new, new, new. I need to go forward with them and that’s what I pray I will do. And maybe there are things I do need to leave behind – materialism, jaded-ness with situations, frustrations. Maybe that’s a bonus.

And I think I will go and run in a field occasionally. They have them in Prague right?

Green field